Beck sits there waiting to be watched

How long would you keep forgiving the same mistake until you'd want to give up?

Right now I'm reading "Israel, My Beloved" and in the first three chapters I had that question rolling in my head.

Sarah is married to her husband and He is perfect. She leaves Him so that she can live the way she wants to. And what she wants in the beginning is lovers. She's tired of being 'tied down' to just Him. She's tired of following His rules and not being able to explore the world.

He, of course, is upset. He says that He'll forgive her. He always had forgiven her. He is hurt so deeply that she'd rather be with other guys than to be perfectly held in His arms. In His presence. He becomes angry, jealous, then back to upset. He yells out in the wind that she will always be His beloved that He'll forgive her.

The first three chapters are pretty intense expressing His emotions.

I then wondered about us. If we're married and we went ahead and cheated on our spouse but then later came back in repentance, how many times do you think your spouse would forgive you before he/she would want to call it quits? Of course we aren't perfect, we haven't been completed in Christ just yet. But as we continue to live we do go through tough situations so that we can be made into perfection. We don't stop, we continually keep growing in Christ and being Christ-like.

It would be really hard. Let's say your husband or wife cheated on you six times so far, would you be able to forgive? What about trust? I wonder if Sarahs husband stopped trusting her knowing that she'd cheat again. But marriage is extremely important to God. So then what? Would you stick around, get couseling together, and work it out? Or would you say enough is enough at some point? How far can one go before you think this marriage isn't worth fixing? You would then think maybe they aren't Christians then if one is always cheating. What about Sarah? Her husband chose her knowing what was going to happen. Again, God is perfect so He can handle it and deal with it accordingly. And He does. He doesn't divorce her though.

So how can we bring this into our own marriages today? If enough is really enough, what then? You don't want a divorce because you care about marriage the way God does, so then what? How could one handle it accordingly?

On the other hand, as i read the first three chapters I was also in awe about the way He expresses Himself and how He still loves her. He does do what is just but it doesn't mean that He doesnt love her. Anyway, I also started thinking, yeah, it would be pretty rad to be married to a guy who would have that same love toward me. I then had to stop and think what am i thinking? I don't need to be married to have that same love when i have it already from God Himself. It came to me once before when i really accepted that i may never get married and that i'd be fine with that. but as i'm reading this book, my heart and thoughts have been changing as well. I don't feel like keeping my eyes peeled or anything. God truly is enough for me. I read once that this guy really wanted to be married and after awhile when he and his then girlfriend broke up he was upset with God thinking don't you want me to be happy and get married? then something stirred in his heart and it was like God was asking him is my love not enough for you? He then started thinking about that and he realized that saying that he needs to get married is really like saying God isn't enough. He realized that God filled the hole and desire in his heart and he then thought i don't mind if i don't get married. He stopped searching and was fine after that.

I've come to that place myself. Sure, I'd like to get married but only if that's what God wants. His love really is enough. If i did get married i'd make it clear that it must be Christ-centered and be done and lived out the way God meant for it to be.

Growing up after my parents got a divorce i stopped believing in marriage. I also didn't believe in divorce either. I didn't have to worry about divorce since i never was going to get married. i strongly against marriage especially, if i ever dated, if the guy didn't take it seriously and know that if we ever came to the thought about marriage that counseling would be a requirement if we slipped away from eachother or divorce was not an option. that i would not allow a divorce and that he would know that for me marriage meant for life, that it meant growing wrinkles with me. i was pretty intense about my thoughts against marriage, if marriage ever came up, and intense about no divorcing.

After i became i Christian, i still didn't believe in marriage but slowly God changed my heart and mind about it. Now my intensity is still strong but strong in a different way. what God wants is what i want.

coming back to the main topic, we are brides of Christ. We will get married to Him. Even now He doesn't leave us. We are the cheaters in this case. Just like Sarah we go after other 'lovers' in this world and yet God still loves us. He still forgives us. We also must come to repentance too. God wants us to realize that His love is enough and we should be wanting forgivenss from Him. That we realize the mistakes we make and know that it hurts Him. In the end though, He is gentle and does rebuke us when we need it. But it's all out of love. And His love is perfect. I want and will always want that perfect love. Nothing else could measure up.